The Preschooler

Odd Man Out

My younger son always seems to be the odd man out.  Whenever we have friends over, the older kids play together, and Elliot is left either begging to be part of the group or giving up and playing by himself.  I don’t know if it is the age, since he is usually the youngest child, or simply a result of having an odd number of children in the house.  No matter what the reason, I always feel sorry for my little guy.

Sometimes he handles the situation quite well, and doesn’t give the other children a second thought when he is not included.  However, there are also times when a battle brews when he perceives exclusion.  I can certainly understand his frustration.  No one wants to be left out.  But attempts to get the other children to include him typically result in Elliot getting the lame part in a role play they have already begun or the other children being distraught at having to let him play.

Thankfully, Elliot does have an older brother that is willing to stick up for him.  Most of the time, Brennen will step in and make sure that Elliot is being treated fairly once I have pointed out that he is being left out. 

It is difficult to teach children about including everyone.  It is even more difficult to teach the child being excluded how to appropriately stand up for himself.  These are skills that we try to teach our children so that they are able to apply them when they face these situations again as teenagers, young adults, and even into adulthood.

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Written by Laura on June 24, 2011